Love Advice

I am 17, I try to help anyone that I can. I have been through a lot and have seen too much. I want to help anyone. To prevent heartbreak, to help people find love, mend the bonds that were once torn, and help people who are lost find their way.

I’m sorry guys!

27. March 2014

I’m really sorry that my messages are short and probably very incomplete. But I’m in a rush to go back to the hospital. Please keep sending me questions, I’m always here to help. I will never deny someone that needs help. I hope y’all are having a good day!

Anonymous: So i'm in a ldr, i love this guy, he makes me so happy and when we talk on skype i can't stop smiling, we're about to be 1 year together and recently we had a huge fight it was because he says that when we talk on skype i don't express my feelings and i know its kind of true but i don't know how to make him know that i love him with all my heart, i try to send him texts saying how much i love him but in the end i necer send them.

I actually can relate to you at this very moment. I’m also in a long distance relationship  and it’s going to be a year next month.. But fights are hard to get over because y’all aren’t there in person Trust me, I know. It’s hard showing your emotions over the internet or whatever, but you have to. Just saying you love him is definitely NOT going to do it. There is absolutely NO feeling in that. Do something sweet, make something for him. Use your talents to show him that you care. Talk more about things y’all can relate to. Yes, after a year online it can be hard to talk about things that y’all haven’t already talked about. What me and my boyfriend used to do is that we would tell each other significant things that happened throughout our day in school. If you’re not in school then maybe work, or random ideas that pop into your heads. Something, anything really. Show him you’re still interested without just saying/sending “i love you”. Make it special.

Anonymous: hey. so i like this boy i go to school with. we both are in the program at school. he is super sweet and super dorky/goofy but i really like that about him. however, he has never really had a gf from my understanding. so he's one of those stereotypical nerds who has never dated, just not that dorky. what are signs he may like me and what are ways i can get closer to him (we are already friends and he is super huggable, too. i thought for a little bit he liked me but idk) thanks!!

Touching, talking with closeness, trying to make excuses to be alone with you, making jokes just to make you laugh, trying to find things out about you. Simple things like that. You have to go along with him and do the same things. Send signals and show him you’re interested! 

Anonymous: First time i kind of fell for a guy's personality... He liked me back but nothing happened and i feel he's moving on.. What should i do to get him back ? (I'm apparently the 'hard to get' kind but i clearly showed him i was interested !)

Open yourself up to him. Maybe he feels like you’re shutting him out because of the hard to get thing. Show him, tell him, make him feel that you care. Try being not hard to get for a moment, see how it it works out.

Anonymous: There is a guy we were really close and we hanged out together at school and some of my friends even tought we were a couple but suddenly that guy started to date one of my old friends. Me and that girl were not that close but we were old friends. I loved that boy. They broke up recently and now there is another boy who likes me and i don't know what to do if he asks me out. I never had a boyfriend before and i just dont know what to do. We are close with both guys and i dont know what to doo :(

It all depends on who you like more. Does he do this for you, does he do that for you, what does one of them do for you (that you like) that the other doesn’t. I my head it depends on whats pest for you and him. Make sure you make the right decision, okay?

Anonymous: There is a guy who is planning to ask me out. I don't love him romantically so i want to reject him but also i dont want to break his heart what shouldni dooo?? :((((

Tell him. Don’t make it sound mean though (obviously). You’re not into him and he needs to know. Sometimes you need to break a few hearts to get to that perfect heart for you.

Anonymous: I need advice. So there's a guy in my golf class he's really shy and I really like him and I'm outgoing and I want to talk to him. But I don't know how to start a conversation. How do I approach him and make a conversation? I've only talked to him like once.

Y’all golf, ask to help you with your swing.. that’s a lead right? Don’t worry, being outgoing is good when it comes to this. IT will come natural to you after a while. Don’t worry, your personality will take care of things. Just make sure you don’t make yourself feel awkward.

Anonymous: So this girl and I have been best friends since this summer and ever since then I have loved her and recently she confessed Her love to me so since that I can't stop thinking about her. She says she wants to hang out more and see where things go but in order to make things go I think I may have to make a move. What do you think?

Sweetie, let me make this short and as sweet as possible… WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME?! Haha, you love her, she loves you, she wants to hang out more. What’s the problem?! Just because you have to make the move doesn’t mean that should scare you. Try.. it could be worth it.

Anonymous: IM IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND AND THERE IS NOTHING I CAN DO! HELP ME?:(

Don’t worry! Calm down before you over think the situation, which it seems like you may have. Everyone every now and then falls for their best friend. Sometimes it works out, or other times it breaks the relationship and makes it extremely awkward for you two. Honestly, there isn’t much I can do. You either have to confess or suppress. It’s a 50/50 type of thing. If you do confess, don’t make it all dramatic. That most likely will drive them away. Just calm down, pick a right time, and tell them. It’s all up to them from there. You also have to be ready if there is rejection. If you suppress then you should look for someone new who isn’t your best friend. But don’t let the feelings kill you on the inside. That’s how it ends up with most people who don’t know how to correctly control the bottled up emotions. If you go with confess, it’s up to them to tell you what’s going to happen. If you go with suppress, then you have to help yourself stay strong and start looking again.

Anonymous: Are you ok?!?!?

Thank you for your concern Mr./Ms. Anonymous! But things could be better for me. Like I said, I’ll be in and out of the hospital to get some help. And no, it’s not a sickness haha. It’s more of a ‘I did this that lead to that’ kind of thing. And no, I do not do drugs lol. But again, thanks for your concern!

Anonymous: Hey I like this guy we don't talk cuz he's older and so different he's just my dream boy he's so cute but I don't know how to approach him some advice please

Well.. it kind of depends on how old he is and how you are. Where y’all normally see each other and if he is giving you any signals at all. But I’ll try to give you the best advice I can. When I liked an older guy I would try to find out what some of his interests are. I did this by not directly coming up to him.. well yeah kind of. I would ask him help with something and it would lead to a conversation. Maybe you can do that.

Anonymous: Hello! Can you give me your advice? I like a guy in my work. When I first started working there he was very nice and attentive, always trying to find an opportunity to talk to me. He also used skinship. The chemistry was always present. But then he changed he ignored me and only talked to me in a cold tone. After a conversation that he started we begin to talk again but now I don't know what to think, Did he liked me at the beginning? I'm confused. Help!

Being confused is normal, but you already knew that I suppose. From what you told me it was obvious that he had some kind of attraction towards you, but then something happened. You probably did something that he saw and didn’t like because he thought there was something there between you too or something. Have you tried talking to him? It might help trying to straighten things out. If you’re brave enough to do more than that then you can/should ask him out to coffee (or whatever your preference is). Another possibility that might have happened is that something went sour in his life and he is taking some of it out on you (because it could have been another girl that hurt him). I know something happened to him though. Like I said, it could have been you or it could have been something in his life that went wrong. I hope I helped and I hope everything works out between y’all. If they don’t then there are other guys out there! Good luck!

Anonymous: Hey! I need advice on a guy. I have a huge crush on guy that always goes to my job. I work inside a college and he's plays basketball. Every time we see each other, we both smile at each other and I sometimes catch him looking at me. My co worker face my phone number to his friend so that he could give it to him because I was too shy to talk to him. It's been 3 days and no calls or text yet! Why is that? I seen him 2 days ago, he was smiling at me. I think he thick sum cute but idk. HELP!

He probably never got the number. That’s kind of why you can’t trust other people to pass on a message. I understand you’re shy and all, but you should at least try to engage a conversation with him then once you’re a little bit more comfortable you can give him your number, your e-mail address, or anyway that he can contact you. You have to try to approach him somehow. Otherwise it’s just going to be smile, stare, repeat. Smile, stare, repeat. Smile, stare, repeat. Smile, s- You get my point. It’s a endless and vicious cycle that needs to be broken.Try it out and see what happens! I hope you get to meet and hang out with the cutie! By the way, be confident! I wish you the best of luck!

Anonymous: Recently, my friend started liking this guys I'm in love with. She was completely lusting after him even though he wasn't into it. It made me uncomfortable, so I told her how I felt about him. We got into a fight over him. The guy hadn't taken sides, but he's been avoiding me for the past month. I have no idea what my he was told but I know people have been talking bad about me. A couple of my friends think that he likes me, but knows the other girl likes him. I don't know if I believe this.

Ugh, gossip and drama. He is avoiding you, right? That is either one of two things : shame or embarrassment. He may feel ashamed because he could have done something with your friend that he feels so bad that he can’t hardly face to. On the other hand, he could be embarrassed because of the rumors saying that he likes you OR he could also be embarrassed because you and your “friend” are fighting over him. It’s never good to like the same guy as your friend. NEVER. It never turns out well most of the time. It could end up with y’all not being friends anymore or it could be a good ending where you or your friend like someone else and everything straightens back out. 

But drama and gossip are just the worst things ever! And honestly, I don’t think you should believe the rumors because that’s what they are, rumors. Passed around from one person to the next and getting all messed up along the way.

Do what you think is right. Either move on (which I am kind of leaning towards) or confront the guy and or your “friend” and see what is really going on. 

I hope everything works out between y’all, I really do. Good luck!

Anonymous: I have an older cousin and I grew up with him and I was always around his friends Chris and Octa were two of them Me and Chris were like the same person and I absolutely hated octa Now were older- one night octa kissed me but I ended up going out with Chris While we were going out octa kissed me again and told me how he felt I've been having problems with Chris he doesn't really know how to handle a relationship and we broke up but my friend said I shouldn't pick octa because it's not right

Oh! A love triangle! I’ve never actually been in this situation so this would be an outsiders point of view. I don’t know if you loved Chris, I don’t even know if you like Octa.. but if you do love Chris then you should help him handle the relationship better. Stick it out! If you do like Octa on the other hand, maybe you should try it out. When he kissed you, did you feel anything? Your friend could be right because Octa and Chris are friend (right?). But it depends on you. Try again with Chris to fix things out, try something new with Octa and see how things could work out, OR still be friends with both or not be friends with them (that’s up to you) yet move on and find someone new/better. I hoped I helped and now that you know your choices, I hope you pick the best one for you! Good luck!